Part 4 of 4 - Start at the beginning here
“I heard you killed the monster,” says a voice behind me. I turn and before me is a beautiful dark haired woman. She looks familiar but its like I can’t remember her name. “It was just a rabid wolf,” I say. “Oh? I heard you went to the house on the other side of the lake,” she said. “I did,” I reply. “Will you take me there,” she says, “I want to see it.” “What, the wolf?” I say. “No,” she smiles, “the house.”
She has small features and large eyes. She looks like she is about 30 but she could be older or younger. Its hard to tell, every time I look at her she seems different. We drive in silence as she smokes her cigarette. When I pull out onto the highway she rolls down the window and slides herself up onto the doors edge and hangs out the window into the wind. She yells and and howls and screams and laughs. I look over at her bare legs and black skirt. She catches me and I feel an almost overwhelming rush of adrenaline, almost like a kind of panic. I calmly try to catch my breathe as she leans into the wind.
When we park at the end of the road and its still daylight but once again, inside the woods it feels like twilight. She is ahead me laughing and dancing around the trees singing a song about death and the sea. My hair is standing on end. I know she isn’t human. But I can’t stop myself. Inside my head I’m screaming ‘Run! Run for the truck get in and drive as fast as you can!’ But deeper in the woods we go. I feel like a hypnotized animal being led to slaughter.
In the clearing the house appears. “Show me.” she whispers. And I walk up the porch steps as the house silently roars through me. “Gimme your machete,” she says, gesturing me towards the door. I hand her the giant knife like a robot. It feels like I’m falling backwards inside of myself as I turn the door knob. Inside the house I am presented with a long hallway, a single door at the other end. I walk cautiously inside and open the door and there is another long hallway and another door. Once again past that door another hallway and another door. It takes me a few more hallways and doors to realize that each hallway is the reverse of the one before. I hear my new friend snicker. She does this sometimes, she likes to make fun of me and have a good laugh trying to trick me, my instincts open like a switch. Sometimes she hits me and tells me to stop, but she doesn’t fool me, fighting or writhing in my hands. I know she will kill me if I don’t strike quickly. Such tiny delicate bones. I feel her teeth at my neck as she claws desperately for my blood. My anger twitches and her neck is always so surprisingly small, so easily broken. Its then my love plays her cruelest trick on me. She tells me she was just some innocent girl and I’m a mad monster. That I’m delusional. I always believe it and I always weep. Her face always looks so soft and innocent. Its really tears me apart inside. It always seems so real. I would have liked to have had a little more time with her. I wish she’d stop making me kill her, my little devil rag doll. I take her down into heart of herself. Into the basement to the black gaping maw that reflects the nighttime sky. It’s always nighttime.
I once was lost and now I’m found
cries the endless yawning black hole in the ground.
I give her female form a little kiss on the cheek and forehead as I gently let her slip into the void. She’ll be back. She always comes back, she loves me.